Negative to Positive
Hi friends!!! I’m so glad it’s already Wednesday again. I love having short school weeks :).
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I don’t always address this on my blog, but it is mentioned in my “about me” page. I haven’t always had a positive body image. That’s part of the reason I went through a disordered eating period in high school. Even though I stopped those eating patterns, I am still not always comfortable with how I look. I can still have consuming thoughts about body.
However, over the weekend I realized something – I haven’t really had any of these consuming, negative thoughts over the past few months. If I have, they have been fleeting and are gone quickly. In fact, most of my thoughts have been positive! Let me tell ya something folks, that is awesome. I was ecstatic when I realized this.
What changed? Why have I not had agonizing thoughts about my body that can make me unhappy?
Perhaps my efforts to consciously really work on loving myself have finally come to fruition. Perhaps I’m finally comfortable in my body and am truly appreciating it for everything it enables me to do. Perhaps it has completely saturated my brain that being fit is truly greater than being skinny.
I think the ultimate thing that has changed, and that has allowed the above things to occur, is that I am very content with all areas of my life. I know that my life isn’t perfect, but I’m happy with where I am and with everything in it.
It’s not that I wasn’t happy with my life several months ago….I mean, I was completely content with my relationships and education and the things I was doing. But, I also felt like something was missing. I didn’t have a hobby or interest that I was passionate about. Yes, I love fitness and reading but I didn’t feel like I had something tangible that I was good at and loved and did for the pure pleasure of doing it.
Then blogging came along. I don’t want to go into a huge long spiel about it, but blogging has become a hobby that I am passionate about. I feel like it has filled a creative, expressive, fun, challenging, and intellectually stimulating void. I love it, and blogging makes me happy- plain and simple.
The other area of my life that was lacking was with my faith. A lot of things have happened over the years to cause my faith and spirituality to be sidelined- family illnesses, negative and judgmental experiences with very religious friends, hipocrisy, etc. I’ve recently decided to try and “work” on my faith (if that’s the right way to put it). I have been praying more, trying to live day to day knowing that I am not alone, and trying to have a relationship with the big man upstairs. And let me tell you, I feel so much more at peace. It was important for me to get it into my head that I can have faith without being confined to religion.
Both of these things have made my life feel more complete. And because of that completeness and sense of content, my negative body image views and thoughts happen much less and are much quieter than in the past. Now, if I do have a negative thought pop into my head, it’s almost as if I’m annoyed with it and I can more easily push it aside. I am now realizing there are better and more important things I could be doing and thinking about.
It’s honestly such a freeing feeling to not be weighed down by negative thoughts about my body. I guess that really becoming happy with my life (and also knowing that it isn’t always going to be perfect and go as planned) and becoming comfortable and satisfied with all aspects of it is what I needed to start switching my body image from negative to positive.
If you have had a negative body image, how did you overcome it?
Do you think that happiness and body image are related?